Immediately, the family dynamic changed and I started feeling guilt over not spending the same amount of time with my son than I had with my daughter. She went to Mommy and Me swimming lessons at 6 months of age; he didn't go until he was almost two! If she got a new toy, why didn't he get one, too? That was only fair and right, wasn't it? The guilt and even-Steven-ness of it all could've made me crazy...and it still almost does sometimes.
For the most part, I try and take a step back and realize that it's not about making everything "even", but about tending to my children's individual, unique needs as they arise. To make sure they know they're loved, cherished, taken care of and wanted more than anything in this world, is the best gift I can possibly give them. Sure, there will be times when one of my kids feels slighted ("She got an extra cookie!") or neglected ("You took him to the playground twice this week, and I never got to go!"), but I'll cross those bridges when I get to them.
For now, I'll focus on kissing, hugging, cuddling and playing with my kids. Then, hopefully, they'll be too distracted to notice.